In the journey of building a cohousing community, there are moments of real joy, excitement, and connection. But there are also moments of deep challenge, times when the path forward is unclear, and the weight of what we are trying to build together feels heavier than ever. One of those challenging times is when founding members—those who helped shape the very foundation of our vision—decide to leave.
Their departure is more than just a logistical hurdle; it’s a moment of collective grief. We grieve the loss of their presence, their ideas, their energy, and all the many contributions they made to our group. It’s a reminder that building a community isn’t just about bricks and mortar; it’s about people, relationships, and the shared journey we are on together.
These are the people who were there from the beginning, who believed in the vision when it was just an idea, who invested their time, energy, and hearts into making it a reality. Their departure leaves a void not simply filled by new members or additional resources. Grieving together is a process that requires us to come together, support one another, and acknowledge the emotions that arise, a process to strengthen our bonds and remind us of why we embarked on this journey in the first place.
Now the challenge becomes how to restabilize the group, how to move forward with the members who have stayed. This is where the metaphor of passing the torch resonates for me. In these times, much like in the Olympics or Paralympics, we are reminded that the journey is not just about individual effort, but about the collective spirit . The torch represents our shared vision, the flame that continues to burn even as it is passed from one person to another.
For those of us who remain, the challenge is an opportunity—a chance to reaffirm our commitment, to reimagine the path forward, and prompt us to reassess our goals, to revisit our values, and to make space for new ideas and perspectives. This process of reimagining is not about abandoning the original vision, but about evolving it—about allowing it to grow and change in response to the realities we face. It’s about finding new ways to engage ourselves and reach out inviting others (will you join in?) to collaborate, and to build the community we all still believe in. The path may be uncertain, but with each step, we are moving closer to the community we all dream of—a place where collaboration and connection remain at the heart of everything we do.
People come and go, any of us working in groups knows this. All the same, it is a bumpy road to journey along. For GrassRoutes, it has been a summer of goodbyes turning to gratitude. Thank you, Wendy, Al and Liz.
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